Where the Wild Roses Grow
by ChildsHeart
Summary: Aconite is watching her daughter grow, but as she comes to turn with her feelings for Sirius, she realizes once again that life just wants to make things better before knocking her down again. ll Sequel to Silent Screams
1. Chapter 1

**Where the Wild Roses Grow**

**Chapter One**

**Ever, and Ever**

Aconite sat on the bed with the toddler cradled in her arms, it had been two years since the birth of Acacia, and she never regretted anything. As she began to grow up, she started to look more and more like her mother. She had some of her father's resemblance, one was the mischief in her eyes especially in the park, and another was how much she ate.

Her first word was not mum or dad, it was in fact kitty, She had bought a little kitten and the cat has grown up with Acacia for a long time. Aconite had named the cat Oracle; it just seemed to suit him. Oracle had a certain way of knowing what she was thinking, Aconite would think about feeding him and he would stand by his bowl, when she thought about getting him fixed he hissed at her. But he is a good cat, although he can read thoughts, that doesn't really explain his name, she guessed she just liked the word Oracle.

"Mama?"

"Yes Acacia?"

"Tugghbnt."

"Sorry?"

"Tugghbnt." She said more forcefully, Aconite still didn't understand what she wanted and that was when Acacia got angry and went red in the face and shouted at her mother before she realised what she meant went a Teddy hit her in the head.

"Did you do that you little witch?" The young mother smiled at her before placing her on her own hip and picking up the brown teddy. "You're a little witch whose going to be causing me trouble eh? Double, double, toil and trouble, fire burn and cauldron bubble." After a soft giggle from her Aconite poked her lightly in the ribs to hear her laugh loudly. "You're just to cute for me." She clapped her hands together and grabbed a piece of hair that had escaped from her mother's ponytail. Giving it a soft tug Aconite laughed at her and gave her the teddy bear.

A rang came from the front door, still with Acacia on her hip with the teddy in her daughter's arms. As Aconite walked from the bedroom to the kitchen where the front door was, a soft rustling of chitter-chatter came from the door. She peeked through the white lace curtains to see Hermione and Ron grinning as they waited for me to open the door.

"Hello Luvs." She greeted the newly engaged.

"Hello Aconite and hello Little Acacia."

"Menny." She said as she reached out to Hermione. Hermione took her from Aconite's hip and tickled her why Aconite invited them in and began to make tea and coffee.

"She's so cute Aconite."

"She should be, seeing as how she's _my _daughter." Acacia was holding Hermione's hands and jumping up and down on her thighs while the mother handed them their coffee and placed her tea in front of herself.

"She's bigger then she was last time we saw her, oh, Ginny and Harry apologize for running late but Harry's been held up at the office while Ginny is waiting for him. " They all shared a small smile knowing exactly what was going on.

"So when's the wedding date?"

"18th of March, I wanted it to be in spring." Acacia reached up and pulled on Hermione's wild hair. A soft _ouch_ escaped Hermione's lips before Aconite took the toddler off her and cradled her before placing the Teddy on the ground. Her eyes drooped into a soft slumber before Aconite placed her in the oak crib.

When she came out of the bedroom she smiled, "That sounds wonderful, spring is always filled with the most beautiful flowers." She shut the door behind her and went back to her tea.

"Exactly, and I told Mrs Weasley that I was going to wear the same wedding dress my mother wore, because who else would, and I find that it's absolutely beautiful."

"Is Acacia still able to be the flower girl?"

"We wouldn't want anyone else." Hermione's charming smile made me remember my fairytale wedding. "Do you talk to the father?"

"I love him and he knows that, if I can't be with him, I still want him to talk to his daughter, he sits and plays with her while I'm out at times, I am happy enough to know at least Acacia will know him."

"Self sacrifice for your daughter, you really are a wonderful person." She smiled at her friends and chattered about this and that. When Harry and Ginny turned up she raised an eyebrow at the couple.

"Ginny, you're looking a bit flustered."

"I was at a doctors appointment."

"I knew it."

"Knew what?"

"You're pregnant."

"It's a boy." Everyone raised an eyebrow before Hermione and Aconite rushed and hugged Ginny. Harry had a past on the back that was a bit harder then it should have been.

"Next time you knock my sister up, warn me first."

"Sure, sure mate." The two smiled as the emotional girls cried over the happy news, muttering about happiness and names before the sobs turned to giggles. The two husbands just shook their heads and mutter women before their wives hit them over the back of their heads.

"She's grown so much." He said with a small smile on his face that brought back memories from when I was just a schoolgirl. And as these memories passed through my eyes, I remembered how my heart thudded when he was around.

"It scares me." It was a thought on the memories that I didn't mean to say aloud, but I was so busy with the thoughts of his fingertips on my skin I didn't realise what I said until it was too late.

"That she's grown so much?" Bitting my lip I thought of telling him a lie and agreeing to that she grows so much so quickly, but I owed him enough to tell the truth, without him I wouldn't have such a well furnished apartment.

"No Sirius, that every time you visit me, I wanted to curl up next to you and sleep." He looked away as I said this. The tea in my hands was going cold and as I sipped it, the taste turned bland. Putting it down I looked at my daughter. "She's definitely a witch, she had a Teddy fly to her this morning."

"I would have been surprised if she wasn't a witch." I smiled at him as I leaned on the table. He was right, she had to of been a witch, but if she wasn't they wouldn't love her any less.

"Sirius, she will find out, I can't hide a secret forever and you know that." Wrapping my hands round myself I looked at the floor. "And when she does, I won't know if you'll still be round, I think other people know, she has your eyes, they couldn't miss it, their my colour and shape, but the way she'd look at me when I catch her escaping, it's you."

"I just can't, you know that, it's difficult to explain, but..." He sighed as he ran his fingers through his hair. "I just can't do this, not now."

I slammed my hands onto the table and looked up at him, "Then when Sirius, it's been over three years since you found out about the pregnancy, you knew she was yours and promised to look after her."

"I know-" His voice was cut of by my screams of empty feelings, the look in his eyes as I interrupted scared me, there was something in there that made me think about what was going on.

"She's going to have no father, and you know why Sirius, you wanna know why?" I could feel the tears falling down my face as I looked at him, he looked so sad as I spat out the last words, "Because it hurts so much to love you that I'm afraid to find someone, because I still love you." Acacia was crying now, he wooden blocks that she was playing with no longer interested her. Picking her up I turned to Sirius, "I love you and you ripped my heart out, I know it couldn't work and I know I started this but I will always love you." One of my windows broke as Acacia cried harder.

Muttering a spell, the window fixed it's self. "Just leave." I said as I rocked Acacia to her crib, slowly and quietly I sung a song. _ "Live forever, for the moment, ever searching for the one." _She calmed down as I heard the _crack_ of Sirius apparating to his house. _"Everlasting, like the sun..." _I sighed as Acacia rolled in her crib before falling asleep. I continued to hum the song as I walked to my bed and burst into tears. My pillow was soaked by the time I fell asleep, my throat was hoarse from sobbing and my ears throbbed with the echoes of my cry of pain.

I dreamt of nothing.


	2. Chapter 2

**Where the Wild Roses Grow**

**Chapter Two**

**I Never Had**

Rocking the baby on my waist I felt Acacia began to wriggle out of my grip, smiling I placed her down next to the blocks she was playing with the day before. Going back to the washing I waved my wand and the clothes began to wash themselves.

There was a knock on the door as I began doing the dishes, wiping my hands on the white apron; I opened the door to see Ginny. Her read hair was cut in a pixie cut as she hugged me and apologized for what happened, and not coming the day before.

"Stuff happened and Harry had an emergency at work and I'm just so busy." She peeked behind me to see Acacia pulling the bottom block from the pile and watching as the stack feel. She giggled a high-pitched giggle when this happened before turning and facing Ginny.

"She's a witch, first sign of magic yesterday, not nearly as cool as what Harry was telling me about his, but still, it's a sign." She smiled at Acacia before turning back to me.

"Has her father visited lately?"

"Yeah, he came yesterday." I looked away ever so slightly, but it was all she needed to know that a new topic was in order.

"So, I heard that you're planning on going to meet other men." She said simply, trying- though unsuccessfully- to change the topic.

"Yeah, I was hoping for a fatherly figure in her life, because her father won't always be there for me or her." I smiled bitterly before going into a different topic with her.

For the rest of her stay we talked about life and it's perks and downers. "Look Aconite, let me and Harry take Acacia for the weekend, we bot got it off and you look like you need a rest." Before I could protest she already picked her up and walked into the room with both our clothes in it. She packed a few things and some toys before she told me she would return with my baby in a few days.

With a last goodbye to my child and Ginny, I smiled weakly and heard them apparate away.

Before I even turned around I heard the crack behind me and turned to see Sirius. "God Sirius, don't scare me like that."

"Look, I'm sorry about yesterday, I didn't mean to make you upset or angry." He pulled out some flowers behind his back and handed them to me. "I want us to have a smooth relationship, especially with Acacia." Grinning he kissed my cheek. "So where is the little marauder anyway?"

"Ginny took her, she said I needed a break away from my child, to be honest I haven't had a descent sleep but it's worth it just to see her laugh." I smiled before turning in the kitchen, "Tea or coffee?"

"Got any butterbeer?"

"Hmm… I think I do." Peaking into the fridge I found three left. Taking two by the hand, I gave one to him and opened one for myself, "I've only had tea since I've had Acacia, but now she's on the bottle, I think I could have one butterbeer." Sirius laughed at me before opening his own beer and taking a huge gulp of it.

"They're non-acholic you know?"

"Of course I do, it's just some of the chemicals in it might of harmed her." He nodded in belief but regardlessly took another mouthful of the drink.

"So, how are you going to spend a weekend without Acacia?" It was a simple question, and yet it seemed he was digging further then he seemed to be.

"Dunno yet, relax I guess." We said a few things here and there, but once again one of us said the wrong thing and trouble started. I never was one to have excellent luck.

"Aconite, please tell me this, are you going to start dating?" I shrugged my shoulders and shook my head.

"Even I don't know about that."

"If you do I can't come back here." I slammed the bottle on the table and stood up looking at him.

"You can't come back? Why? Because he might find it suss that you like to visit me, or maybe because you can't stand seeing Acacia with another fatherly figure? Huh is that it?"

He grabbed my wrists and pinned me to the kitchen counter, it dug in my back as his face, filled with a mixture of pure anger and confusion, read my soul. "Do you want to know why I can't come back? It's because I can't stand to see you with another man, it's because Acacia does deserve better and I can't stand that been proven that I'm a shit father, it's because of you."

"Me?" I said weakly as the counter, that was drive into my back, began to make a mark from the pressure of been pushed onto it. "Me?" I said a little louder and a little more forcefully. "All I ever did was love you."

"That's why, if you never loved me, you would be happy with a real boyfriend, possibly getting married and having a great job make millions by the year." I slapped him, how dare he tell me it's my fault for loving him.

"Bastard." I whispered, it was then I realised how close his body was to me as his hands wrapped around my waist and his lips force themselves upon my own.

And I took all I could from him as he went into me as I lent on the kitchen bench. It was so much different then when I was at school, it was harder no emotion but anger, but it made me realise something. I missed the feel of being in power over him.

Pulling my pants up I stood up, "Won't the school be wondering where you are?" I said as I looked at the time, he also stood up and wrapped his hands around my stomach and kissed my neck.

"They won't start looking for me unless I miss tomorrow's classes." With that he sun me round to face him and pinned me against the wall as he kissed m neck and worked his way down.

When he got to my pants, he unzipped them and pulled the down slowly, before reaching for the underwear, kissing me softly I felt the wave of pleasure I long since had forgotten. When his tongue began I remembered my voice and began to say his name slowly, but as I reached climax I began to say it a little louder until was screaming it.

When he stopped I collapsed to the floor, both of us too exhausted to do anything but just lie there. I pulled my pants up and began to crawl to bed. "I'll see you tomorrow then?" He asked and I nodded, after all, I had the weekend off.

With that he reached for his wand and apparated away from my sight. When I reached my bed, I stripped my clothes off and crawled into it, feeling the coolness of the blankets against my hot and flushed body felt nice, like a cold shower or a really hot day.


	3. Chapter 3

**Where the Wild Roses Grow**

**Chapter Three**

**I Dive Deep**

My eyes fluttered open as I felt a weight on the bed, looking down I saw him at the end of the bed smirking, he eyes my clothes and raised an eyebrow. _Oh right_, I had taken them off last night, and worn nothing to bed.

"You know what we never tried out." He commented as he stood up and walked over to the other side of the bed, "The shower." I smirked, he smirked and I jumped up and showed him to the one shower, one sink, one toilet bathroom that was clean.

Needless to say an hour later I came out fresh and awoken, with Sirius holding me bridal style out of the evaporation smoke left over from the hot water. "So, what else have we not tried out?" I asked mischievously as I kissed him on the cheek.

"I believe we only tried out the bedroom once." He said as we entered in the bedroom. As the door closed behind us, we heard another slam of the door and froze. "Shit." I muttered before running around some clothes to chuck on as I heard the footsteps of someone coming closer.

"Aconite?" It was Ginny, damn her to well… somewhere annoying. Coming out the bedroom and shutting the door behind me I saw Ginny with Acacia in her hands. "Oh Aconite, how was you little holiday?"

"Oh, good, good, I hope she didn't cause too much trouble." I said as I took her from her arms and held her, kissing her cheek as she giggled at me and held me tightly around the neck.

"Oh she was such an Angel." Ginny gushed as she smiled at Acacia, who was now looking at the bedroom door quite curiously. I guess with his brains and my hearing, she knew something was there.

"Acacia? Are you sure this is my daughter? Angel, never, she could be a mar-" But I caught myself before I finished the sentence, instead I smiled and said, "She could be a mini devil, maybe I should get her prada's just to say she is a devil in prada's." She looked at me confused as her brown eyes sort of sparkled with curiosity on what I said.

"Oh- Muggle joke." She smiled warily and kissed me goodbye before muttering something about 'an appointment with a healer' and 'in a rush'. Shaking my head I put Acacia down and grabbed Sirius' clothes off the bathroom floor. Drying them with a quick spell I handed them to him and smiled.

"She's gone." He kissed me quickly and grabbed his wand off the kitchen counter as he passed out daughter. "Now, I better leave before the school does get suspicious." With that he nodded his head at me and kissed Acacia on the cheek goodbye. "Love ya Darling." He said before Apparating away, and he was directing it at Acacia.

If only it was to the both of us.

**†**

"Oh bloody hell." I muttered as I ran around trying to catch Oracle before the blasted cat decided to actually catch the damned mouse. The mouse was one the twins damned jokes; they had paid a nice visit and tormented my kid as I tried to make them a nice cup of coffee. 

"Gotch ya." I said as I grabbed the mouse, which then turned back into my tea cup, by then I had lost my appetite after seeing it turned into a mouse and it still had whiskers. Marching to the boys with my hands on my hips and my eyes looking at them straight in they eye, I said in my best _Mother_ voice, "What was that?"

"A simple spell we've been trying out, it's going well don't you think?"

"Try it on my daughter and you're dead." Said before turning to Acacia who was colouring- out of the lines- in her magic colouring book, that glowed when you chose the right colour to the number, she enjoyed choosing the wrong colour, especially when it glowed red and said, wrong colour, use blue or what ever colour. 

"Oh we would never try it on her." Fred said to me as he took the crayon out of my daughter's mouth and showed her the right colour to use.

"Exactly, we do have some sense, besides, the wives already gave us a stern talking to, right Fred?" Said George as he lent back in the chair and smiled down at Acacia who- would you believe it- smirked up at them as she held Fred's wand.

"How in Merlin's name did she get that?" He exclaimed as he reached for his wand, which was currently **not** sitting in his jacket pocket as he thought. I smirked down at the boys as I crouched down in front of Acacia.

"Give Mummy the wand or no Teddy." She handed it to me and looked sort of angry as she did so, handing the wand to Fred I tickled my daughter and gave her a raspberry on her stomach as she tried to squirm out of my grasp.

"Mama, stop." She said through a laugh as I picked her up as I span her a bit before butting her on my hip, one of her shoes had fallen off through the struggle and her hair, also with my own, was out of place, but we were both still giggling slightly.

"Wow, you two are too much a like." Said a grinning George, who received a raised eyebrow from myself and a raspberry from Acacia. Laughing he spoke once again, "Point proven."

"We'll have to send them home don't you think Acacia?" I kissed her cheek as she yawned, "Sorry boys, but Acacia and I have had enough for one day." My stomach turned as I glanced as the whiskered teacup. "Also, you ruined my appetite for the day." I smiled at them as they apologized and kissed Acacia and me on the cheek goodbye before leaving with a _pop_.

"Come on then love, time for a nap." She snuggled into a crook in my shoulder as I took her to my bed and snuggled her against me.

"Nighta momma." She murmured before drifting to sleep. I wiped some hair from her eyes and muttered goodnight before falling asleep as well. Before sleep caught me I smelt a slight smell of Jean Paul Gautier. It might of just been a dream though.


	4. Chapter 4

**Where The Wild Roses Grow**

**Chapter Four**

**Tell Me That You Need Me**

Acacia sat on the bed with a teddy in her arms and her mouth opened ever so slightly. Behind her I held her softly trying to move with out waking her up. But in the end I awoke her and she looked at me confused and still, half asleep.

"Looks like I'm not the only one who needs a coffee." I said as she crawled into my lap and snuggled her head into my tummy. Picking her up I placed her on my waist while her head was on my shoulder.

As I stood up, I realised I had yet to change into my p.j's and instead had just gone to sleep in a shirt and underwear. Smiling I took Acacia with me to the bathroom and washed the two of us before changing into jeans and a t-shirt.

Acacia wore a soft dress and as I helped her to stand up, she looked down at the dress and pulled at it, it looked as if she was making sure it was really there. Smiling up at me she giggled and bounced up and down before taking a few steps forward.

"Come on luv, we're going to go to the shops." I placed a bonnet on her head before lacing up her shoes and putting my own on before holding her hand as we walked out the door.

Diagon Alley was filled with parents picking up things that their children had called for, saying they broke or needed new of. In one cases, a young child was going for their fist wand, obviously turned eleven recently and won't be starting Hogwarts or another school, until the school started the next year.

A few people she knew smiled at her and told her how much her daughter had grown, a few stranger's who heard this comment, either 'whispered' how young she was to have a child or sometimes one would come up to her and call her awful names.

They did not know me, and through this I gripped my daughter's hand, I would never turn back time to stop this from happening, no matter what. When I walked into the pet shop to pick up some food and treats for Oracle, I saw an old friend by the name of Luna Lovegood. Her arm was wrapped around a boy; I believed to be named Jesse, if memory serves me correct.

"Luna, hey, how are you?" I asked as I removed Acacia's hand from the cage in which a not so friendly owl was ready to bite of the fingers.

"Oh Aconite, I haven't seen you since, well this one came to the world." She said as she patted her head. Her long blonde hair was tied in a plait and went over her shoulder and fell to her hip.

"I know, and I'm so sorry, we should grab a coffee or something, if you're not busy of course." I added, knowing that Luna at times could be so wrapped up with the surrounding world, she forgot about things.

"Oh, Jesse, would you like to come with us?" Luna asked, as her baby blue's sparkled up at her partner. Wether she was silently sending a mental message or not, I knew nothing of, I was carefully making sure Acacia did not poke any of 'the pretty kitties'

"Oh no, you two-three, go right ahead, I'll just go to the quidditch shop while you're there." He smiled a dazzling smile and kissed Luna goodbye before he grabbed their bags and walked off.

"So are you too?"

"Straight after Hogwarts, we would of invited you, I swear, but he wanted just family." I nodded in understandment, besides, I probably would have been to busy with Acacia to notice (or even care) about a wedding.

As we walked to a café, the two of us had a nice conversation on what I had missed through the few years with Acacia. At the Coffee shop, I had a nice mocha and got a small drink of orange juice for Acacia. "So tell me about the in-laws."

"Oh well, the first time we met was when they came to my dad's house, if it weren't for the fact Jesse and I were hopelessly in love, I'm almost certain they would of pulled him away from me."

"How's the art career going?" I asked as Acacia tried to struggle out of my lap. Grabbing a napkin, she turned it into a crane for her to play with for a little while. "Good then?"

"Oh, well, not really, it's sort of a hobby since I've been more into teaching students about myths and legends to students and writing a few books."

"Oh I saw one called, the _'Snorklacks: Proven Myth or Reality?'_ that was a good read, I had a few laughs at some things that just reminded me of sitting next to you in Hogwarts at times."

"Oh yes, Jesse seemed to think that if it weren't for me being me, my beauty would probably be the only thing he liked, I'm not sure if that's a compliment though…" She seemed to trail off in thought until she saw the Crane had landed in her latte.

Pulling it out, she smiled and pulled her wand out before turning it into a flying crane that buzzed around Acacia's grasp, dodging her tiny fist.

"I should go and find Jesse before he tries and buys that new broom." I grinned and laughed a long with her light laugh.

"Give me a message or drop in at any time, I live over in an apartment next on the street opposite the leaky Cauldron." She kissed Acacia on the forehead goodbye before giving be a tight hug and running off to find her husband.

Acacia and myself finished our shopping before heading back home where I put everything away and gave Acacia a bath, it seemed that the shower this morning was to no use either of us as we were both covered in dirt here and there.

While we were bathing, there was a knock on the door, quickly charming my self dry and putting myself and Acacia's clothes on, I answered the door on the forth knock.

"Hey Ginny, what's wrong?" She looked at me angry and threw something onto the table. Hands on her hips she raised an eyebrow at me. Grabbing I looked at it and found it quite familiar.

"I knew I recognized that mischief in her eyes." She said to me darkly as she paced up and down the room. Opening the book, I saw it to be my diary from school; I had lost it after I left Hogwarts and some how it fell into Ginny's hands.

Swallowing softly, I looked Ginny straight in the eye and told her quite plain and clear, regardless of the truth that; " I have no idea what in the world you're talking about."

"A Smith boy my ass, Acacia is not Acacia Rosette Smith like you said, but Acacia Rosette Black." My eyes widened in terror as I realised she had found out. I turned away from her and took a deep breath,

"Please Ginny, please tell no one of this, no one you know **ever**." I emphasised the word _ever_ so she'd realize that no one was to know of the dirty little secret. She hugged me and promised me before sitting me down.

"Start from the beginning." And so I did. I told her how I first seduced him, and how we sneaked so many times behind and at times in front of Harry, Hermione and Ron. I told her about what happened when I found about the pregnancy and I told her what he told me to say.

But I kept some tales confidential, regardless of what she read, I knew that some things would be kept hidden from her, like the fact that I slept with him in the not so past, past.

"So he doesn't love you." I shook my head sadly before taking a sip of my tea, the tears had made it slightly salty, but it tasted better then what I suspected a butterbeer would.

"I can't take it much longer." I whispered as she hugged me softly and ever so lightly. "I wish that he would tell me that he needed me." But the wish was an empty wish that would never be fulfilled, which depressed me so much.


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N:** I realise that Snape is nothing like I wrote him to be, but for the sake of my plot he is, I really don't hate him, but if I mixed another character in the story would be all wrong okay? Great!

**Where The Wild Roses Grow**

**Chapter Five**

**Who Am I To Disagree **

When Ginny left, I picked up the blasted diary and my wand and cast _incindo _on the cover. I enjoyed watching it burn into a crisp of nothing and dust. The charms had long since worn off the diary and caused mayhem into my life.

So in turn, I faced my daughter and picked her up, I cooked the two of us a light meal before putting her to bed and when the reality of what Ginny had said sunk in, I ran to the bathroom and threw up my dinner.

I could still smell the sharp scent of the vomit even after I had a shower and brushed my teeth. But I lived with it as I crawled into bed with my daughter. I hugged her and as I did I felt as if I was safe, I may not feel happy, but I was safe.

The next day when I dressed into my black robes, I visited Sirius to tell him what Ginny had found out, it was Christmas Holidays and I was feeling slightly nausea with telling him. I even through up before I left, but at the moment I stood at the doors to Hogwarts.

Opening them I placed Acacia a little higher on my hip and walked, to what I remembered, was the path to his classroom. I held my fist a few inches from the door and made sure that this was what I wanted, before I knocked.

I heard a movement of a chair and the shuffling of footsteps before he opened the door, in his hand was a butterbeer and his eyes told me that something was not right. "Sirius, what's wrong?" I touched his face but he jerked away and pulled me into the room before shutting.

"He knows." Sirius said as he paced around the room, "I don't know how, but he knows Acacia is my daughter, did you tell him?"

"Tell who? Sirius, I haven't told anyone about Acacia." I would wait until later to tell him about Ginny.

"So you didn't tell-" There was another knock on the door, and when Sirius opened it, I saw his posture straightened and his muscles tense; only one person I knew could make him do that.

"Yes Snape?" He asked through clenched teeth, the room suddenly felt darker and older as Snape entered the room, his robes flying behind him.

"Ah, so I did see your face Aconite." I turned away shamefully as Snape stepped forward and looked me straight in the eye before his onyx eyes flickered to Acacia, "And you brought the Junior Black Twerp."

My blood ran cold and almost froze as his words processed through my mind, the only thing I could get to leave my mouth was, "How…?" I trailed off, too confused, too tired, and too scared to actually string a sentence together at that one moment.

"So there was a student-teacher, relationship right under not only mine, but the Headmaster's nose, I wonder what he'd think of this."

"No." I screamed out and grabbed him as he was about to turn away to the door, I couldn't let him jeopardize Sirius's work and life, I couldn't have it destroyed in a single sentence, I couldn't see him hurt, no matter how selfish I am. "Please Severus, I'll do anything, just don't get him fired." I pleaded, I begged and I grovelled with my eyes, I couldn't have that happen to him, Sirius may never talk to me again. "I'll do _anything_ you want."

He seemed to think for a moment before his lips curved into a cool smirk and he looked me straight in the eye, at this moment I felt as if everything was pouring out of my mind. "We'll discuss this later." His eyes flickered to Sirius, "In my time, and in a secure place." With that he left, and for that instant, I though I knew exactly what he wanted, but boy was I wrong.

When he left Sirius grabbed me around the waist and pulled me closer, Acacia was still on my hip and quietly wondering what was going on. "Does anyone else know?" Sirius's voice broke me from my trance from what I and Snape had said."

"Yes." I whispered quietly before Sirius cursed loudly, "Ginny promised no to tell." He seemed to relax ever so slightly.

"Is that everyone who knows?" I nodded my head and placed Acacia on the ground before hugging him tightly. My fingers grasped the back of his shirt and penetrated his skin.

"I'm sorry Sirius, I am, I didn't want any of this to happen, it's not fair on anyone." My eyes leaked tears as Sirius slowly wrapped his arms around me. After a few moment I let go and picked up Acacia, "Do you mind if I floo out?" He shook his head and led me to the room behind his classroom, a fireplace lay there and he gave me some floo powder.

Kissing my cheek he said goodbye and left me to floo out, getting a tight hold on Acacia, I left for my apartment. And when I arrived, who was I to see standing there but Severus Snape.

"W-What are you doing here?" I asked softly as I clutched my daughter to my chest, Severus stepped forward and without even changing an expression from his face, the room felt cold and as if wind would echo down the hallway.

"I want one thing from you in turn for secrecy." With that said, my daughter found herself locked outside the bedroom with her toys and her tears dried on her face. I found myself with my clothes stripped from me in the bedroom; I said I would do anything, if only I had known what I had agreed to.

The entire time I hated it and I loathed him, I was hurt and felt as if he did I to not only spite me but also Sirius. Because although I knew I could never tell anyone of what happened, I knew that Sirius had ideas on what happened.

Through out the entire process of the rape from my soul, I bit my tears away and tried not think of the cries Acacia had screamed when He told me to out her down and do as he told.

I tried not to think of Sirius as this happened, and what he would think of me if he was to find out what I did to save him, how his face would fall and his anger would build, how he would look at me with disgust when I talked to him, and how he would never touch me the same way. I also tried not thinking of the pain that rocked through my entire body.

When it finally ended, he left me to clean up the blood that had left my body. I had crawled to my child and held her close and finally then, I let the tears fall. But who am I to disagree that what I said was what I promised and fulfilled.

The next day I found myself in the living room, still naked and clutching my child who was playing with my hair. Instead of smiling, I picked her up and took her into the bath where I promised to never lose her. Then I cleaned up the bedroom, but when I finished, I left the room and knew I would never be able to sleep there again; the nightmare of what had happened caused my body to shudder and my inside to squirm.

Running to the bathroom, I threw up and found that I couldn't move from the bathroom. Laying my head down on the cool tiles, I felt the warm evaporation of water from the shower, heat my body as I fell out from the world of reality and into a sleepless dream where I recovered nothing but pain.


	6. Chapter 6

**Where The Wild Roses Grow**

**Chapter Six**

**I Will Fight And I Will Stand**

When I woke up, I woke up to find myself in the arms of Harry as Ginny held Acacia behind him. Harry was carrying me to the bedroom. When I saw this I screamed and jumped out before crawling away from the bedroom and going into the living room where I went into fettle position.

"Oh Aconite, what's wrong." Ginny had passed Acacia to Harry and ran towards me as I silently rocked backwards and forwards, I shook my head and stayed where I was, my heart beating so loudly in my ears at the thought of returning once more to that room. "Aconite, come on." She wrapped her arms around me and tried to comfort me.

Slowly I wrapped my fingers around her arm and just held on like a little girl, after a little while she pulled away and held my hands, a silver bracelet slipped down her arm onto her wrist, tinkling slightly and awakening me from my nightmare. "What happened?" She asked as I slowly let my legs straighten out before relaxing the tense muscles.

"D-doesn't m-matter." I said my teeth chattered at the soft memory of what happened. My mind was piecing together what is and what had happened.

"But it does, was it… him?" she asked slowly, after a few seconds I got that she meant Sirius and I shook my head, I tried to form words in my mouth, but they came out mumbles and inconsiderate words that made no sense. Shaking me head I tried once more, slowly and using simple words.

"He found out." I said softly, but hoping she heard and understood what I said, but now, I would not dare speak his name, would not dare say what I had to say and of what happened, I couldn't and I wouldn't.

"Who… Dumbledore?" I shook my head and stretched my hands out for my baby girl, Harry handed the screaming child to me, when she was in my arms she instantly calmed down and wrapped her arms around me.

"Scary man." She whispered into my shoulder as I rocked her from side to side and I nodded, she was talking of last night, she knew Harry and Ginny's face, but she knew none of… _his_ face. I kissed her cheek and stood up shakily before going onto the couch and curling up.

"Shh… mummy is here now." I whispered before I placed her down and ran to the bathroom. I made it to the toilet where I threw up and I realised something so very terrible. What if Snape had impregnated me? What if I was carrying his seed this very moment?

Pulling the cabinet above the sink opening, I heard a sicking smash as the glass from the front of I broke off, at the moment I didn't care. Running my fingers through the bottles and vials of what lay in the inside of the cabinet, I found what I was looking for and I placed it in my mouth before spitting it out.

_Gold_, I was pregnant. "No," I whispered before slamming my hands onto the sink. Whipping around I walked back into the room with my child and picked her up. I was going to see a man about a termination. But before I left, I walked past the kitchen and remembered the time when Acacia was babysat for the weekend.

_What if…_

"Wait, Aconite where are you going?" I turned around and looked at her, like death looked at a young girl who had her whole life a head of her and was begging to die.

"I'm going to go see a wizard about a baby." With that I pulled my wand out and apparated before either could stop me. When I found my self in front of the Hogwarts grounds, I swiftly moved straight forward to my destination. Kids of ages looked at me in wonder as I opened the door of the Defence Against the Dark Arts room and looked at Sirius who was teaching.

He stopped and excused himself from the seconde year class before coming out. "What are you doing here?" He asked as I placed Acacia on the ground, my eyes darted around the corridor before I whispered softly, "I need help." With that I collapsed onto him crying and he held me.

"Oh Aconite what's wrong?" He whispered softly as he rocked me back and forth. Acacia pulled on the bottom of my pants as she looked up at me confused.

"I said anything and I didn't understand what it meant, now… now we're- I'm screwed, help me." The sentenced spilled out of my mouth before I could stop it, the pain of what had happened and the terror of what he will say.

"Who…" But his voice was cut off and a low growl exited his voice before the word "Snape." Exited through clenched teeth. He stood dup to leave but I stopped him, I had to.

"No, don't, please t-there's something else." I spluttered out, and he swiftly turned around and grabbed my shoulders, anticipation burning his soul as he waited for me to say it. Breathing in deeply I said it, "I'm pregnant." His eyes widen in shock before he lanced at my stomach.

"And I don't know how far along, s-so it may be yours or…" I couldn't say his name so instead I looked Sirius straight in the eye, "I can not carry his child, if it's his it will be terminated, if it's yours well-" Before I finished my sentence I heard a noise that sounded of Snape's robes and footsteps. "Just remember I love you." With that I kissed him softly before picking my daughter up and running away and taking a few secret passageways I remembered so I could double back behind him and run out of the grounds.

Acacia held on tightly as I ran out of the grounds and quickly apparated, but not home. I could never return home, no instead I found myself at a muggle hospital. Entering I made an appointment to double check the potion and also to see how far along I was.

I sat for three hours waiting until I was finally called; twice I had to go to the bathroom to take Acacia there. But now I was finally called. When I entered, I ran through the main tests and it came back positive.

But when they checks how far a long was I, they told me at least three to four months. It was Sirius', but I couldn't go back and tell him. I might run into _him_. Shaking my head, I thanked the doctor before leaving. Acacia the entire time was sitting next to me. Picking her up I carried her as I apparated to my next designation.

Knocking on the door, Hermione and Ron appeared, they look crestfallen as I told them I just needed to borrow their owl and paper. I stayed for a cup of tea while I waited for him to get the message and apparate here.

It was midnight when she decided to break into the Department of Mysterious with nothing but the clothes on her back and enough money to get her through a fair amount of weeks without pay.

With the halls silent and her movements stealthy, she reached every right turn. When it came to the doors that separated her from life and from pain, she chose and ran. It was the right door, but when she saw them dangling there, their rusted chains just in her reach, she wondered.


End file.
